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Crawling out of the darkness and getting your life back

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My Journey Out Darkness Glimpse at Life in Paranorm by Faust Mrs Holly L | eBay

English Choose a language for shopping. Audible Download Audio Books. Alexa Actionable Analytics for the Web. Until… one day I noticed when I laid him down on his back, his eyes would swirl around and eventually disappear far down in his eye sockets… like he was trying to see way past his nose.

Kristin Smedley

Good luck. I was mad. I was really mad. What about my plans?

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And so began the biggest, longest tantrum of my life… longer than I will ever care to admit…. While I prayed for a miracle that his vision would improve, his vision worsened. After three years of being fully consumed with raising a blind child, my husband and I made the decision to go for baby 2. The genetics counselor warned us. The doctors warned us.

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After considering all the information, we decided to move forward with having a sibling for our son and growing our family. And then on and on I went with my ultimatums list… me telling Him how the Plan was gonna work…. And with that he skipped on out of the room, literally happy as can be.


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And there it was, the moment of proof, a moment I now see as one of many miracles: my son did not see his blindness as sadness, so why did I? I am not sure if you have ever had a moment of surrender… but this was mine. If indeed I was meant to raise two blind kids, than You better send me all the tools I need to do it, and to do it well.

And yes, he is blind too: same condition as my first son. Although it is never easy to hear that one, let alone two, of your children are anything less than perfectly healthy, I will say that thanks to the whole surrendering night, this second diagnosis was much more bearable than the first… and honestly, this time I had my first little guy and his big beautiful smile to help me realize that although challenging, this was going to be a journey I could handle.

Once my thoughts and my attitude transformed to the positive, I became so much more productive….

Column: My long journey out of the darkness

That meant I had to learn Braille so they could learn Braille. I had to find out about canes and safe travel so they could learn the techniques. I had to find out what blind people do for a living, what they do in their free time, how they access tv and computers and games and phones and….


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At the same time, our family built our team that we needed to advise us medically, educationally, etc. We flew around the country to see the best doctors to get a true understanding of the rare disease our boys have and what to expect. I read books about successful blind adults and we sought opportunities to get our boys up close, literally, to blind role models so they would know the sky is the limit for them.

My daughter is fully sighted — so much so that to this day she is 10 I sometimes still stare in amazement at just how much she can see! Ever since I gave birth to two children with no sight, I so greatly appreciate the gift of sight, especially in a child….

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Also, in running a worldwide foundation that addresses blindness, with most of the patients being children, I talk with people every day about the milestones their blind children are hitting, about reading levels they are at, about education plans, teaching strategies, etc. Funny how the training life brings your way ends up being for a purpose way different than expected….

But what did happen was a shift in my way of looking at my path and at my challenges that came into my path.

I mean, I knew I was meant to be the Mom of these three kids… but my purpose had to be more about me as a person, in addition to me as a mom.